The Worst Flirt in the Building

Two weeks later, I could tell what time it was by which part of my shift Avery chose to interrupt.

If I was changing his water, I got a flick of black tail across the seat of my work pants. If I was cleaning the glass, I got the same flick with the added humiliation of seeing my face in the reflection. At three in the afternoon, I was usually writing something down. He’d let me get exactly far enough into a sentence that I had to cross the whole thing out.

The first time, I’d assumed his tail happened to be there. By the sixth, I was experimenting with decoys.

I knelt in front of the glass and leaned forward. In the reflection, his tail rose off the ground.

I straightened without turning. It went down.

I leaned forward again.

Whap.

I spun around. Avery had his chin on the branch, the picture of innocence. There were leaf fragments stuck to the tip of his tail.

“Fine,” I said. “If you have a problem with my work, fill out a complaint form.”

I spread my towel across the bench and reached for the spray bottle. His tail came down on the clean corner.

I pulled. Avery pulled back.

“You are aware that I’m the one who washes these?”

He tightened his grip on the towel.

“Sure. Take it. I hope it never dries.”

Neither of us let go.

Ben went past the observation window, stopped, then backed up. “Do you need help?”

“We’re in a meeting.”

“Does he want a union rep?”

Avery pulled hard enough to send my knuckles into the bench. Ben kept walking before I could recruit him.

The towel went slack a moment later. Avery lowered his head until we were almost at eye level. He could look intimidating when he wanted to. At that particular moment he looked like somebody who’d cheated at cards and was waiting to see how much of the money I’d let him keep.

“Don’t look at me like that.”

He came a little closer.

“You’ve been horrible to me all week.”

His chin settled lightly against my palm. I’d offered my hand without thinking about it. I could feel the shape of his jaw and the slightest give as he let me take its weight.

“Good thing you’re pretty,” I muttered.

I knew nobody could see me from the hall. I bent and planted a quick kiss on the top of his head.

It was an absurd thing to do. At the time, it felt like the natural conclusion to an argument I’d been having with a snake for fourteen days.

Avery stopped moving.

I waited for him to pull back. He stayed exactly where he was.

“Avery?”

His tail hung over the side of the bench. I couldn’t see it move even when I leaned over to look.

“Hey. Are you okay?”

I took my hand away. He kept his head at the same height. The silence lasted long enough for me to start considering all the ways I might have broken my only unbreakable coworker.

I found Dr. Carter in the next room, putting away a tray. I must have looked as rattled as I felt, because she set it straight back down.

“What happened?”

“He’s holding very still.”

She gave me a second to finish. I didn’t.

“Come show me,” she said.

By the time we got back, Avery had lowered his head to the bench. He was responsive for Dr. Carter, which was a great relief and, in a small ugly corner of my heart, an insult.

She took her time checking him. I stood with my hands stuffed under my arms so I couldn’t get in her way. The towel was still on the floor between us.

“His heart’s racing,” she said eventually. “What happened right before this?”

I looked down at Avery. Even with the doctor on his other side, he was watching me.

“We were fighting over a towel.”

“Did anything happen after that?”

“I won.”

I heard a small scrape. The tip of Avery’s tail came over the edge of the bench and curled into my sleeve.

Dr. Carter looked at the tail, then at my face. She picked up her clipboard.

“I’ll put down that he’s responsive,” she said.

I stood there for another minute after she left. I had a full shift’s worth of work still to do, including a towel that badly needed replacing. Avery’s tail would have slipped free if I’d pulled my arm back an inch.

I let him have my sleeve until he was ready to let go.