"He Asked Me To Kill Him" Chapter 30 The Thing About Hunger
The sanctuary garden existed three floors below street level beneath a collapsed cathedral ceiling open to the night sky.
Snow drifted slowly through broken stone arches while dead winter vines climbed old statues worn faceless by centuries of weather and neglect.
Someone had strung warm lantern lights through the trees anyway.
Because apparently vampires insisted on making emotional breakdown locations aesthetically pleasing.
Seraphina paced across the frost-covered stone path with her arms folded tightly against the cold.
Not because she needed warmth.
Because she needed somewhere to put the anger.
Humiliation.
Jealousy.
God.
Jealousy.
The word itself felt deeply offensive.
“You’re walking like you’re planning homicide again.”
Lucien’s voice arrived from the archway entrance behind her.
Seraphina closed her eyes briefly.
Of course he followed her.
She turned sharply toward him.
“You should stop doing that.”
“Following you?”
“Appearing places while being emotionally composed.”
“That feels difficult to control.”
Snow settled lightly across the shoulders of his black coat as he stepped farther into the ruined garden.
The lantern glow softened him again.
Unfairly.
Everything about Lucien lately felt unfair.
Seraphina resumed pacing before her brain betrayed her further.
“You’re angry,” Lucien observed quietly.
“No.”
“You left a room dramatically.”
“I left a room efficiently.”
“You nearly dislocated the door handle.”
“That sounds structural.”
A faint almost-smile threatened briefly.
She pointed at him immediately.
“No.”
Lucien blinked once.
“No what?”
“No doing that right now.”
“Doing what?”
“That tiny smile thing.”
The expression disappeared completely afterward, replaced instead by visible confusion.
Which somehow made things worse.
“You’re upset because I smiled?”
“I’m upset because you let that woman touch you like she owned stock in your emotional damage.”
Silence.
Oh no.
No no no.
The sentence replayed in her own head half a second later with horrifying clarity.
Lucien stared at her.
Seraphina stared at the snow-covered ground.
Somewhere in the distance, sanctuary pipes groaned softly through old cathedral walls.
“Well,” Lucien said eventually, voice quieter now. “That explains several things.”
“Forget I said that.”
“I don’t think I can.”
Heat crawled violently up her throat.
Catastrophic.
Lucien stepped closer slowly.
Not cornering.
Just enough to enter the lantern light properly.
“You were jealous.”
“I was assessing a threat.”
“She called you pretty.”
“That felt tactical.”
Lucien actually laughed softly this time.
Real laughter.
Warm enough to ruin lives.
Seraphina looked away immediately because God help her, hearing him laugh felt intimate in ways she was not emotionally prepared to survive.
The ruined garden settled quieter around them while snow drifted through the open cathedral ceiling overhead.
Lucien’s voice softened after a moment.
“Seraphina.”
She looked back reluctantly.
His expression had changed again.
The humor faded.
Something more careful remained underneath it now.
“Why are you really angry?”
The question landed harder than expected.
Because the truthful answer sat terrifyingly close to the surface already.
Seraphina folded her arms tighter.
ADVERTISEMENT
“You invoke ancient vampire laws without asking me.”
Lucien nodded once.
“Fair.”
“You protect me constantly.”
“You’re being hunted.”
“You look at me like I matter.”
That one escaped accidentally.
Silence followed immediately afterward.
Not awkward.
Worse.
Honest.
Lucien stood very still beneath the falling snow while distant sanctuary lights glowed softly behind him through the cathedral ruins.
When he finally spoke, his voice sounded lower somehow.
“You do matter.”
There it was.
No games.
No teasing.
Just truth delivered quietly enough to hurt.
Seraphina’s pulse stumbled hard against her ribs.
Because Lucien never said things casually.
Every word from him felt chosen carefully before release.
And suddenly the entire past several weeks rearranged themselves in terrifying clarity:
the frozen lake;
his hands shaking after pulling her from the water;
the way he asked permission before touching her;
the sleepless nights beside sanctuary windows;
the constant carefulness like she was something fragile he feared mishandling.
God.
The realization hit all at once.
Lucien stepped closer again.
Close enough now that snow melted slowly against dark fabric and pale skin while cold winter air tangled between them.
“You’re still angry,” he murmured.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
Seraphina looked directly at him this time.
At the exhaustion beneath his eyes.
At the impossible restraint he wrapped around himself every second near her.
At the man who spent centuries surviving loneliness and somehow still chose kindness anyway.
And suddenly the answer became terrifyingly obvious.
Because she was angry at herself.
For wanting him.
For trusting him.
For looking at a vampire and seeing home beginning to form quietly around the edges.
Lucien watched her carefully.
Waiting.
Always waiting for her to choose instead of taking.
That unbearable gentleness again.
Something inside her cracked softly after that.
Not dramatically.
Just enough.
“You make me forget what I’m supposed to hate,” she whispered.
Lucien inhaled slowly.
The snow kept falling around them.
Neither moved.
Neither looked away.
And then—
before fear could catch up properly—
Seraphina grabbed the front of his coat and kissed him.
Impulsive.
Messy.
Nothing graceful about it.
Months of tension collided all at once in the cold ruined garden beneath falling snow and cathedral light.
Lucien froze completely for one shocked heartbeat.
Not because he didn’t want it.
Because apparently even now he still waited for permission.
Then his hands found her carefully.
One against her waist.
One lifting slowly toward her face like he still couldn’t quite believe she was real.
The kiss deepened immediately after that.
God.
Centuries of restraint turned out to be a terrifying thing once broken.
Lucien kissed like someone starved carefully for too long.
Not rough.
Worse.
Intentional.
Every movement slow enough to feel chosen.
Seraphina’s fingers tightened instinctively against his coat while cold winter air and lantern warmth blurred together around them.
And somewhere beneath the shock and adrenaline and catastrophic attraction—
she realized Lucien was still holding back.
Even now.
Even kissing her like this, he treated her like something precious enough to break accidentally.
The realization nearly ruined her completely.
When they finally pulled apart, neither stepped away immediately.
Snow drifted softly through the ruined cathedral ceiling overhead while both of them breathed unevenly in the quiet garden.
Lucien rested his forehead lightly against hers for one brief disbelieving second.
Then, very softly—
like the confession surprised him too—
“You have no idea,” he murmured, “how long I’ve wanted to do that.”
ADVERTISEMENT
You May Also Like
-
CompletedChapter 8
The Divorce Papers Were His. The Prenup Was Mine.
Glow-Up10.1k words5 57 -
CompletedChapter 7
The Wife He Tried to Erase
Glow-Up8.9k words5 11 -
CompletedChapter 14
Forgotten vows under the snow
Five years ago, Clara and Ethan were the golden couple, their future written in the stars—until a scandalous leak destroyed everything. To protect her family, Clara made the ultimate sacrifice, playing the villain to push Ethan away, while hiding a truth that would haunt them both. Now, fate brings them back together in the sterile silence of a hospital corridor. Ethan is a cold, brilliant surgeon; Clara is a desperate sister fighting to save her family from a tragic cycle. As old secrets surface and long-buried emotions threaten to break the surface, can a love broken by lies and secrets ever find its way back to the light?Glow-Up|Second Chance19.3k words5 16 -
CompletedChapter 14
The Unspoken Vow
Five years ago, on the eve of our wedding, I was shattered. I was forced away, labeled a traitor, and vanished into a life of silence. Now, standing in a clinic as a doctor, I look up to see the man I once promised to marry—standing there with his new fiancée, ready for their pre-wedding checkup. He doesn't recognize me, yet every glance he gives feels like a blade against my skin. I thought I had buried the past, but Liam is back, and he is determined to unearth the truth I’ve kept locked away. Can we ever rebuild what was broken by secrets, or are we just two strangers tethered by a tragic past?Glow-Up|Second Chance19.4k words5 14 -
CompletedChapter 16
When the flowers wither
For three years, Ginger lived in the shadows as Luke’s secret girlfriend, ghostwriting love letters for him to send to other women, including the radiant Luna. After a heartbreaking breakup where Luke chose his pride over their relationship, Ginger decides to walk away for good. Just as she starts her new life in Shanghai and finds potential happiness with the gentle Sean, Luke suddenly reappears, desperately trying to rewrite a past he once treated as disposable. But in the game of love, Ginger has finally learned the most important rule: once you've given up, there's no turning back.Glow-Up|Second Chance21.4k words5 20 -
CompletedChapter 14
The Mortician’s Silent Goodbye
For three years, Clara has lived in a marriage defined by rigid, suffocating rules. As a mortician, she is constantly surrounded by death, but her husband, Julian, a celebrated heart surgeon, treats her presence like a source of contamination. He forces her to disinfect herself repeatedly until she is invisible in her own home. When she discovers Julian’s double standards—welcoming his colleague, Stephanie, into his personal space without a hint of the fastidiousness he forces upon his wife—Clara finally realizes that her only sin in his eyes is simply existing. It is time for her to walk away from the cold, sterile cage and start a new life, three thousand miles away, where she can finally breathe under clear skies.Glow-Up|Fake Relationship18.5k words5 14 -
CompletedChapter 13
My Ex's Secret Life
For two years, Aiden lived in the shadows of Vanessa, his secret girlfriend and a rising star. He gave her everything—his time, his devotion, and his resources—only to be mocked by her as a "clingy fan." But when Vanessa trades her integrity for a sponsorship deal with The Su Corporation, she doesn’t realize she’s stepping into a trap laid by the very man she discarded. Now, Aiden is stepping out of the shadows. As the son of the powerful Su family, he is ready to pull the curtain on her fake life. Vanessa thinks the game is over; Aiden is just getting started.Human Nature|Glow-Up|Second Chance17.4k words5 11 -
CompletedChapter 13
The Unwelcome Guest
Chloe thought she was just going away for a month of training, leaving her inheritance—a charming house her mother left her—safe and sound. But she returns to find her house occupied by her neighbors, the Hendersons, who have turned her sanctuary into their personal party space, with her fiancé Liam standing by, insisting she just "be reasonable." From stolen jewelry to forged lease agreements, Chloe realizes her fiancé hasn't just opened the door to her home; he's plotted to trade her life and legacy for his own gain. It’s time to stop playing the "nice girl" and start playing to win.Human Nature|Glow-Up17.8k words5 9 -
CompletedChapter 13
The Unheard Goodbye
For seven years, Clara lived in a world of silence, protected by the tender care of her husband, Marcus. Or so she thought. Every gesture, every sign, and every vow he made to her felt like a fairy tale—until the day her hearing finally returned. The reality that shattered her world was not one of love, but a calculated performance designed to satisfy his true obsession: another woman. As the truth about the "sacrificial marriage" and the cruel secret behind her infertility surfaces, Clara realizes that her seven-year love was nothing but a fragile bubble. It is time for her to stop being the pawn in his game. Leaving behind everything, Clara walks away from the life she once cherished, ready to silence the man who once taught her how to listen.Glow-Up|Marriage of Convenience18.5k words5 8 -
CompletedChapter 10
The Billionaire’s Regret
Sienna once loved Julian with her entire heart, sacrificing everything for a ten-year devotion that ultimately shattered against the cruelty of his betrayal and the life-altering trauma of a landslide. On the day she was buried under the ruins, Julian chose to save his "true love" first, leaving Sienna to lose their unborn child and her own future as a mother in the cold mud.Glow-Up14k words5 8